Friday, August 14, 2015
Season two of True Detective was a divisive show. Some people loved it while others hated it. Here are my six takeaways from it: (spoilers below if you haven't seen the show yet)
1. Weird Sex Hugs Result in Babies
There were a lot of weird things this season on True Detective this season, but the weird pre sex hug between Bezzerides (Rachel McAdams) and Velcoro (Colin Farrell) may have taken the cake.
It went on much longer than it should have, and was uncomfortable to watch like junior high kids trying to figure out what to do with their bodies. That said, you can't argue with its one and done baby making results.
Friday, July 17, 2015
At first this teaser from The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 2 just seemed kind of weird, then I realized they were just stomping the yard albeit with guns.
This part of the Stomp the Yard trailer fits seamlessly with the Mockingjay teaser: What the hell are they doing? They're stomping the yard. Where are you from?"
Friday, June 19, 2015
This time Carl's Jr has really gone too far. They introduced a burger that has two hot dogs and potato chips with a burger patty called The Most American Thickburger.
Who wants to eat that and why? It's pretty much the equivalent of "bacon up that sausage boy," and your heart will definitely hurt.
Friday, May 29, 2015
Unless Arsenal wins the FA Cup this weekend, this parody video of Mark Morrison's 90s hit "Return of the Mack" called "Return of the Fan" represents their greatest accomplish of the season.
The song replaces the original lyrics of "Return of the Mack" with Arsenal fans' lament about what to do during the soccer off season.
Arsenal players Per Mertesacker, Aaron Ramsey, and Laurent Koscielny feature in the video while proving that a German, Welsh, and French person can't keep the same beat.
The real MVP of the video has to be Per Mertesacker who goes full drunk guy at a wedding by waving a towel and passionately lip synching.
If "Return of the Fan" was really truthful, it would have had the lyric, "You lied to me. You said you'd win the Premier League."
Friday, May 8, 2015
Mcdonald's decided it was time to update their Hamburglar character by making him a real person with a wife and son that's also very creepy in his spare time.
Maybe I've seen too many Criminal Minds and Law and Order SVU episodes, but he looks like the type of guy that commits sexual assault crimes with burgers.
Friday, March 27, 2015
I had never heard of this place before, but they paid a lot of money to show commercials during March Madness because they're always on. Apparently it's quite popular in the South, and seems similar to Chick-Fil-A. All I can think of when I see Zaxby's is chicken full of beard hair because they use the Duck Dynasty people as spokesmen. I prefer my chicken hair free.
Friday, December 5, 2014
At the 19 second mark of "Uptown Funk," Mars sings, "This hit, that ice cold Michelle Pfeiffer, that white gold"
On a side note can we all agree this song sounds like it should be on the 80s Ghostbusters soundtrack?