Friday, April 16, 2010

BlackBuster Movie: Why Do Fools Fall in Love?

How do I know "Why Do Fools Fall in Love" is a Blackbuster?  I actually watched it when it was featured as BET's Blackbuster movie for the night.

Even if I didn't, two things would have tipped me off: the only white guy with a semi-significant part turns out to be evil and Vivica A. Fox has a major role.

Unfortunately,  Fox is not only an indication of a Blackbuster, but also the sign of a bad one.  Aaron McGruder knows what he's talking about in his "Boondocks" comic strip when he blames her for the low quality of movies.

This is possibly the worst movie I have ever seen.  It gets nothing right as a weak narrative and poor editing and cinematography are only a few of the many things wrong with the film.  There are movies made by high school students better than "Why Do Fools Fall in Love?"

The film's title takes it's name from the 1956 hit song by Frankie Lymon and Teenagers as it revolves around Lyman and the three women he married during his life.  They include his first wife Elizabeth Waters (Vivica A. Fox),  singer Lola Taylor (Halle Berry), and third wife Emira Eagle.

Instead of focusing on the more interesting story of Lymon being one of the earliest  child stars that struggled because his voice changed at 15,  it centers on a 1986 court case years after his death where his three wives dispute who should collect Lymon's royalties from his song "Why Do Fools Fall in Love."

It's about as interesting as it sounds and the method of employing flashbacks to Lyman's life via the wives testimony makes the structure convoluted as well as backwards.

Especially when the movie uses a weird flashback with voiceovers within the flashbacks to quickly glance over Lyman's abusive childhood.

Too bad they couldn't flashback to a better movie.  Judging by the performance scenes, they must have been choreographed by Milli Vanilli because there's a ton of lip synching.  I don't think it would have been that hard to find a black guy that could actually sing.

The crapfest only gets worse as the director seems to forget he isn't making a soft core porn as there's excessive sex scenes and believes odd camera angles and shaking the camera produce drama.  Wait that sounds a lot like porn, maybe the director really did think it was one.

Honestly, Halle Berry is the only redeeming aspect of "Why Do Fools Fall in Love?," but I'm sure she cringes every time someone remembers that she was in it.  She'll probably throw you off her property for even mentioned it.

There was one great fact thing about my viewing experience though.  It was the BET commercials.  Now if you've ever watched BET, you know that they have "special" commercials for their audience.  This one in particular was great:

I thought the insurance I already had was fine, but now I realize that I need to step up and get grown man insurance.  Especially if Dennis Haysbert tells me to.

Why didn't anybody tell me about this sooner?  Does this mean I've covered for anything that may happen at a grown and sexy party? I'm not really sure if white people are allowed to get this insurance which seems kind of unfair.  At least I'm eligible for it though, so that makes me feel better.

So to wrap up, "Why Do Fools Fall in Love?" is a Blackbuster not worth seeing and you need to get yourself some grown-man insurance.

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