Thursday, May 6, 2010

Can't Buy Me Love Shows That You Can Really Buy Love

The 80's teen film  "Can't Buy Me Love" only proves that you can buy love.

For those unfamiliar, it features a young Patrick Dempsey as nerd Ronald Miller who seeks to improve his social standing by bribing the most popular girl in school, Cindy Mancini to pretend to go out with him for a month.

Ronald's plan works to perfection.  He not only becomes cool, but Cindy who he's had a crush on for years, begins to fall him.    Although,  Ronald becomes so enamored with his new social standing that he alienates Cindy and his uncool friends.

Eventually Cindy tells everybody about the deal and Ronald loses everything.  Realizing his wrongs, Ronald wins Cindy back with 80s persistence or as it's known now: stalking.

So in essence, Ronald really did buy love.  If he doesn't bribe Cindy, there's no way in hell that she ever gives him the time day.  He'd still be watching scrambled 80s porn in his bedroom.

Cindy only started to like Ronald because she was obligated to spend time with him.  Time which he paid for, and that ultimately allows him to win her back in the end.

You can't really blame Ronald for buying love because it was the 80s and you could buy anything with money.  Charlie Sheen wasn't buying escorts, he was buying several chances at love.

I swear Richard Gere in "Pretty Woman" must be the grown-up version of Ronald because he actually takes it to another level with buying a prostitute and falling in love with her.

Tell me again, how that's suppose to be romantic.  It's illegal in almost every state and he's paying a prostitute to stick around.  Although, it makes a great story to tell your children how you met.

So if the 80s and early 90s have taught me anything,  you can buy love.  Especially if the woman is desperate for money.

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